DAY ONE OF ABSOLUTE EMPLOYMENT

Well. That's it. I went to work today.
For 11 hours. At $10/hr. But that's only initially. Once I get thru training, I'll be making close to $5,000/mo.
It just seems like happenstance that I always end up with a job that makes more money than the last. I don't know how I do it. I just blunder into it like Forrest Gump or something...
Anyway, I'm not installing DirecTV, I am installing only ADT alarm systems. I was very nervous, at first; going into people's homes and drilling holes in their walls, but I can see myself getting used to it. I am now considered Happy.
The Oscars... WHY? You know what? I don't give a rat's ass about who wins what or why. And I certainly do not give a flying, carnivorous rat's ass about the goddamn after-parties that every two-bit glamour whore and humpmeister hosts after the red-carpet gala. I am inundated with news items, and I use that term loosely, relating all the gossip of who did what with whom and when and frankly I just wish there was a Grand Incinerator to throw all this crap into. Out of sight, out of mind. And I wish America as a whole would do the same thing. Just don't buy that People rag or US weekly or whatever the hell is the rumormill du jour this week. I am taking a gigantic dump as I type on Bennifer and TomKat, and the insidious, odious, quasi-human things that came up with those car-crash names in the first place. As you can tell, I abhor gossip. The Jews have it right -- lashon ha ra, indeed!
So, as you have properly inferred, I hate this time of year. Only because of the Oscars and their celebrity-gossip bullshit. There, enough, I've beat a dead horse...
Well, I've tried to come up with something intelligent to say, and all that came out was this tripe, so you can't say I didn't try.